My rating: 4.5/5 stars
Jennifer Hartmann is one of my instant buy authors. She is so deep, so lyrical and emotional, that all of her stories leave you breathless and emotionally damaged. I need to confess – I’ve chosen this book by its title, because I love the age gap trope more than I can say. What took me by surprise is the size of the age gap, the social message, and the feelings behind the story. It was truly an adventure.
“Older” is the story of Halley and Reed, two people who find each other by accident, but are united by feelings and connection. Initially, Halley lies about her age, leading Reed to be more bold and to make a move that will change their lives forever. Even though the contact was minimal, the emotional damage has already been done, and it will follow them. For you to understand, when they initially met, Halley was 17 and Reed 34… NOW THAT IS AN AGE GAP!!!
Later on, Halley will learn that Reed is her best friend’s dad, and things will get sooo complicated, because not only is age an obstacle, but also the blame of unintentionally hurting the people they love. They were not aware of the ties, but even after finding out, they found themselves in each other’s path every time. It was not something they mastered; it just happened.
Halley was a very brave character, a very good soul, but her life was a mess. Having an abusive father and an alcoholic mother, she grew up alone, most of the time bruised and beaten, without anyone to call family. Tara (Reed’s daughter) and Whitney (Reed’s ex) were her neighbors, and after seeing what happened to Halley, they took her in permanently, offering her a home, love, and affection. To clear things – Halley loved them dearly, but her connection with Reed was something she couldn’t manage well, getting deeper and deeper into those feelings that took them both by surprise.
Reed never intended to let his relationship with Halley progress, mainly because of their age gap, but the way their connection progressed, things spiraled out of control and escalated fast, but not in a physical way. They will get intimate by the end of the book, so everything happening until then was purely a connection in which they found what was missing in their life. It was not about being abused or naive; it was about knowing what you want and what you miss in life, and being brave enough to seek and ask for it.
The book left me so confused because, at the end of the day, there is a social dilemma about an acceptable age gap. It’s not our business to judge or to discuss, but the social aspect is there, and it’s the primary issue when a certain relationship like this is written. I’ve been reading so many age gap books that I feel like I’m immune, but 17 years did make me question a little, but not in a bad way. It made me question what Halley needed, and I felt so sorry for her childhood and for her teens, for her problems, and the way she had to grow up. What happened with Reed was not infatuation; it was love, and there were actual feelings that took over. She didn’t fall for him because she wanted freedom, but because she wanted desperately to feel whole and completed. He was her freedom.
Those 0.5 stars were taken from the final rank because of Reed, but I don’t have a specific explanation of why I actually took them out. I don’t have another scenario in which things could have gone another way, but it did make me doubt him a little. I understood his relationship with Halley and his position with Tara, and also how the world would judge him, but I am not fully satisfied with how he handled it by the end of the book, and when everything exploded. I feel like I wanted something more, I didn’t receive it, but I don’t have another version… Please don’t judge. 🙂
What can I say? I will need some time to digest everything I read in this book and to adjust to the emotional turmoil, but it really was an adventure worth every minute.
And I almost forgot… My favorite band is Oasis, so you can imagine the thrill I felt with all the references and songs, and playlist. 😦
Ramonisme 